The Wedding Is Just Another Night Out With Your Partner
Assuming you’re sure in your bones that you want to marry this person, remembering this will make things easier.
Sure, it all depends on what type of bride (or groom) you are. There are bride/groomzillas, and then the Sleeping Beauties (like me, who zoned out for most of the pre-wedding process, then showed up on the wedding day and got it done). Don’t get me wrong, I was all about marrying my now husband. But the whole thing happened during my last semester in graduate school (we’re adventurous like that) and I had to pick my battles. Whatever the circumstances, even if you are the type who’s known the shape, color, and feel of the wedding dress from age 12, this idea might help you too.
So you’ve been dating for a while (hopefully) and decided to tie the knot. You have two choices. Yes, only two. You can embark on a quest for insanity, or you can just…well, get married. It sounds simple because it is. However, humans love complexity, and so many make the mistake of turning the wedding into the apocalypse.
To be fair, a wedding is the perfect setting for disaster. It might as well be the reason why Murphy’s Law came into existence. I mean, I still don’t have possession of my wedding video, and the wedding ended…years ago. I walked down the aisle in complete silence; the sound system stopped working right before I took my first step. I forgot to put on deodorant (we got married outdoors in May, in South Florida).
“Well, that’s why you have to obsess over every detail”, you say.
Wrong. No matter how hard you try (and I know my good, obsessive husband, tried really hard), I promise you some things won’t go as planned. So what can you do?
First, stop calling it the Big Day. If you ask me, the big day already happened. It was a while back when you decided to say YES.
Second, start seeing it for what it is. A few hours for the two of you. A night out, if you will. You know, when you decide to look extra cute for each other. Have a few (or several) drinks, dance some (or lose a shoe on the dance floor), hold hands, and laugh. Then go home (or away), and end the rendezvous happy.
It doesn’t matter how many guests you have, how many bridesmaids and groomsmen, what type of cake and party favors. It doesn’t matter if you’re getting married by a friend in your backyard, or in St. Peter’s Basilica.
Think of your wedding as just another day of the many you’ll both have to share. Because that is exactly what it is. With this mindset, everything will be (or at least feel) easier from the moment you start planning.
Our wedding ended. The plan was to continue the party with some friends somewhere nearby, once the paid time at our venue ran out. But my change of clothes was nowhere to be found. I had a sip from my drink and called an Uber. I changed clothes back at the hotel (and finally put on some deodorant). Then we headed back into the night and had a blast.
